The Fresh Prince of Old Swan

In West Derby born and raised
In the ale house is where I spent most of my days
Chillin out maxin relaxin all sound
And all shootin some footy outside of the ground
When a couple of cunts who were up to no good
Started makin trouble in me neighborhood
I got in one little fight and me ma wanted me gone
And said you're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Old Swan

I phoned for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said "Scouse", and it had one wing mirror
If anything I could say that this cab wasn't one
But I thought nah forget it, yo home to Old Swan

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie, "Tar mate, see ya later!"
Looked at my kingdom I was finally gone
To sit on me throne as the Prince of Old Swan

Ray's Motivational Playlist Part 1

I've got a playlist that I play to myself whenever I'm feeling down and need to be reminded that I'm AMAZIN. It also works as a workout/jogging playlist, a revision playlist and I've recently discovered it can work as a sex playlist. I will be composing an actual sex playlist soon so look out for that. Anyway here's Part 1 of the playlist...


The Lighthouse Family - Lifted
The bloke from The Lighthouse family is my second favourite black man behind Dave Benson-Phillips who used to present Get Your Own Back. I listen to this song most mornings while I look in the mirror and repeat 'I'm amazin' to myself 100 times. I honestly can't think of a better way to start the day. AMAZIN.

 




Michael Jackson - Man in the Mirror
I sometimes chose to listen to this during my morning mirror ritual on the days when I'm not arsed about the Lighthouse Family.

R Kelly - World's Greatest
Really uplifting song, doesn't need explaining really but I will say I do not condone pissing on underage girls. That is not AMAZIN.  


Cast - Alright
Scouse band and this song just makes me feel AMAZIN! If you don't like Cast then you're a nobhead. End of discussion



David Bowie - Heroes
This song makes me think I could be a hero if only for one day, then it ends and I realise I already am a fuckin hero!



George Michael - Amazing
As the title suggests, this song is AMAZIN! You'll often hear this on at full volume in my house.

COME DINE WITH RAY

I wanna go on Come Dine With Me so I've decided to make my own dinner party menu. If you don't already know 'avec' means 'with' in French, I just thought I'd add a bit of French to make it dead sophisticated and that. I'm sure you'll agree the food all sounds AMAZIN. I've taken into consideration that some people are fussy bastards and don't eat meat so I've made the menu suitable for vegetarians because I'm dead considerate and don't discriminate. So who's coming to mine for a dinner party?

Fakadakis For Liverpool Manager

I've applied for the Liverpool job. Here's me CV, what do you think?

Thought I'd make a blog and that

Reached 3,000 followers and it seems a lot of people are liking my tweets so I have decided to start a blog. No idea what type of stuff I'm gonna write on here yet and I'm open to topic suggestions.